Surrendering

I've been a parent pretty much my whole life. Ok, maybe more like half my life. Actually, more than half my life. Anyway, it's been a really long time and I've enjoyed every minute of it. Ok, maybe not EVERY minute of it. Being a mom to my son and daughter is all I've ever known. Waking up each day to care, support, worry and love them and then going to sleep focusing my love and energy towards them. I've been doing this for long it's all I know and it's all I've wanted, so now is really the hard part for me. My son is grown and gone for the summer. My daughter is becoming a self-sufficent young woman and I am left wondering what to do. It's a strange, new experience for me this so called "freedom", where not every minute of my life is taken up by caring for children. You might think I'm nuts for missing the madness, but I do, so I find myself in a constant struggle to let it go. The urge to "smother"....that's my term for being an overzealous mother ;-).

Hawaiian Presidency

Big news this weekend! Simon got accepted into a work exchange program in Maui and is leaving for Hawaii on the 13th for three months! He'll be learning all about organic farming and he's totally excited to work on the farm and begin the adventure. And Cheyenne was just voted student body president of her high school for her senior year! She's been the VP of her class the last three years and it was just a matter of time until she took the big title. She's such a go-getter! Needless to say, I am so proud of each of them. They are growing and learning and most of all achieving their goals. Now I just need to work on my own.

Pablo

There is a little boy named Pablo and he has cancer. He was the topic of my very first blog. We met him and his family during the summer of 2006. The family has a blog (http://getwellpablo.blogspot.com/) that details their journey with childhood cancer over this past year. I follow their blog pretty regularly and have been happy and saddened by their ups and downs, but I always thought everything would work out for the best. This morning his dad (Jeff) posted the most heart wrenching blog entry to date. Pablo just completed chemo about a week ago and the cancer is already present again... and this time in his lungs. The kid is frickin’ five! How could this be? Why him? Why any of us? I am deeply humbled and reminded how blessed my life has been. I can’t even imagine how you come to grips with losing a child. I am hoping for a miracle. They still exist, don’t they?

Helicopter parenting

I am "helicopter parenting" my grown ass son. For those you know you don't know the term, it refers to the type of parent that attempts to control and be present in every aspect of their kids life, but not in a good way...more like, hyper-involved to point where the kid can't mess up or learn things on their own because the parent is always hovering...hence the term. Today's society is full of "helicopter parents" and I am guilty of it too. I can't help myself at times. I just want to help to the point of helping too much. Setting alarms, making sure they get up, calling to find out if they will be home on time since they need to wake up early for work the next day or trying to give advice whether it's been asked for or not. The list goes on and on. I think I'm being helpful, but it drives them crazy at times and for good reason. They both have been very patient with me and realize it comes from a good place, but they have each asked that I take a down a notch. With my son, it's a little less cute and endearing and according to what he said this morning, slightly insulting. He said he feels like I don't think he's capable of doing things on his own...but I feel like if I don't follow up that one time....then, that will be the day it would have been helpful....I know, I know, I have a problem. BTW, my arms are tired of hovering and I have only myself to blame.

Last night marked my one year anniversary at Recreate Fitness

So, exactly one year ago I went to my first class at Recreate Fitness. All I can say is what a difference a year makes! I walked in not knowing what to expect from them (or me). However, I did survive my first work-out and the soreness that followed. But I keep going back because I really enjoyed the work-outs, the change I was seeing/and feeling, but most of all the people. Nathan and Tina are amazing. My fellow gym members are amazing.

Last night, we did the "Helen" work-out. It's a benchmark work-out and I had never done it "prescribed". It was fitting for the night. It became apparent when I completed my last pull-up (36 in total), that my year had paid off. I am more fit and strong than I have ever been in my entire life and it feels good....except my arms feel like they want to fall off right about now.

If you were born after today’s date in 1988, we will not sell alcohol to you.

We are all familiar with those signs in and around stores, restaurants, bars, etc., but never before have I felt so shocked by one of them.

See, my son turns 21 this year and so when I saw the first sign with HIS birthday year, I almost shrieked NOOOO! out loud in the store.

This is the year! This is the year my little, baby boy officially crosses the finish line into pure adulthood. How could this be? I'm not scared for him because I think he is a very responsible, young man and will treat this new phase with grace....or at least I hope he does...anyway, I'm scared for me. If he is officially old enough to buy alcohol, then I'm just plain OLD! What's next? As you might have guessed, I'm having a tough time growing old gracefully this week. Maybe I'll work it on next month. In the meantime, I will continue to slather on my moisturizer EXTRA thick each day.